We were watching a World Cup halftime show recently when something caught our attention. It wasn’t a tactical adjustment the trailing team had to make going into the second half, and it wasn’t an injury update or some brilliant piece of analysis.
It was four unopened bottles of Coca-Cola. One in front of each person on the panel, perfectly positioned with the labels facing the camera. Not one of them had been drunk out of or even opened, and the panel of talking heads didn’t look at them once.
And suddenly we couldn’t focus on anything else. Now, I understand sports sponsorship. Broadcasters have bills to pay, and major events like the World Cup don’t come cheap. Sponsors help make the whole thing possible. That’s not the issue.
The funny part is how we’re all expected to pretend those bottles just happened to be sitting there. Nobody mentions them. They simply exist, like carefully placed props in a Broadway play.
The host is discussing tactics. The analysts are breaking down key moments. Meanwhile, four bottles of Coke stand at attention like they’re participating in the broadcast. At some point, we started joking and wondering what would happen if another company sponsored the show and got the same treatment.
Imagine the Home Depot Halftime Report. Instead of Coke bottles, each analyst has a 50-pound bag of manure sitting in front of them. Label facing out, of course.
The director says, “Okay, panel, we’re going to take a look at that first goal by Argentina. But before we do, could someone move Steve’s bag of cow crap a little closer to Camera 2?”
Or maybe Home Depot decides to showcase a new line of power tools. Now the desk is lined with weed whackers and cordless drills. The panel spends the entire segment trying not to knock a chainsaw onto the floor.
Then there’s the McDonald’s Match Center with four untouched Quarter Pounders with cheese and four orders of large fries in front of the panel.
The analysts are discussing defensive tactics while staring over a wall of sesame-seed buns.
“Excellent pressing by Spain; they definitely dominated the first half.”
“Agreed. Also, our Quarter Pounders remain in excellent condition, but the fries are getting cold.”
What about a vodka sponsor?
The Grey Goose World Cup Update. Four bottles of vodka are spread out across the desk while the director ensures no one takes a gulp during the commercials.
The reason these examples sound ridiculous is that they make the product placement impossible to ignore. Yet that’s exactly what’s happening with the Coke bottles.
We’ve simply become accustomed to seeing beverages on television desks. Coffee mugs on morning shows. Energy drinks on racing broadcasts. Water bottles at press conferences. Because they’re familiar, they don’t seem strange anymore.
But replace the beverage with almost any other product and suddenly the entire setup would look absurd. Imagine four lawn mowers lined up in front of a soccer panel. Or maybe four vacuum cleaners for the Hoover Halftime Report.
The concept is identical. The only thing that changes is our reaction.
The bottles are there for one reason: somebody paid a lot of money for them to be there. And to be fair, they’re probably doing their job.
Coca-Cola didn’t become one of the world’s most recognizable brands by accident.
Marketing and product placement work, and companies spend billions of dollars proving that they do.
What makes me laugh is the theatrical nature of the whole exercise. Everyone involved knows exactly what’s happening and why. Yet everybody participates in the polite fiction that these four unopened bottles naturally belong on a sports analysis desk.
At least the bottles are harmless.
In an era where some sports broadcasts seem determined to turn every second sentence into a betting promotion, four silent bottles of soft drink are relatively easy to live with.
Still, once you notice them, you can’t stop noticing them. The next time you’re watching a pre-game or halftime show, take a look at the desk and count the products. Notice how carefully they’re positioned and how rarely they’re touched. And then imagine if the sponsor happened to sell fertilizer, weed whackers, fast food, lawnmowers, or vodka instead of soft drinks.
johnberkovich.com 