Life often feels like a race; sometimes, the finish line seems miles away, and you feel like you’re sputtering and losing ground as time passes. We compare ourselves to others, checking social media where everyone seems to be living their best life, achieving milestones we haven’t even started yet. Feeling like you’re falling behind can make it easy to spiral into doubt and frustration. But that sense of being “behind” is often just an illusion created by unrealistic comparisons. Just because your friend loves to travel and has the money to do so doesn’t mean he is better than you. It means he spends his time and money that way while you may be perfectly happy renting a cottage in the woods by a lake for two weeks and completely unplugging.
The first step in breaking free from this feeling is remembering everyone’s journey is different, and you are not competing with anyone. This was brought home to me years ago in a Calvin and Hobbes comic strip. Calvin was going on about accumulating things and getting ahead when Hobbes asked, “Who are we racing?” There’s no universal timeline for success, and people often show only their highlights. We all face setbacks, delays, and detours, even if they’re not visible to the outside world. Recognizing that your path is uniquely yours is crucial in reframing how you view your progress.
When you feel stuck or left behind, it can also help to focus on the small wins. What have you accomplished today, this week, or this month? Every step forward, no matter how small, is progress. Rather than looking at everything you haven’t done, shift your focus to what you’ve achieved. Celebrate those little victories to build momentum.
Another important aspect is to reframe the concept of time. Time is not linear, and progress isn’t always immediate. Life often happens in phases, and what feels like falling behind may be the time needed for a new opportunity or a period of self-reflection and rest. Sometimes, what feels like being stuck is simply a necessary pause for growth.
When you’re in a moment of doubt, it can also help to reach out for support. Talk to someone who understands. A friend, a mentor, or even a therapist can help you see things from a different perspective and remind you that you’re not alone in your struggles. Everyone faces challenges that set them back, but it’s how you rise from them that truly matters.
Finally, be patient with yourself. Just because you feel like you’re behind doesn’t mean you’re failing. It’s your journey. Life is full of unexpected twists, and things can change quickly; what matters most is how you continue to move forward, even when it feels like you’re not. Focus on what you can control, take things one step at a time, and trust that your unique path will unfold in its own time.
John Berkovich Talks 